I’m a writer blog

Guidelines for writing Poems, Stories and Tales

How to know you are over-explaining and oversimplifying a subject?

What is over-explaining a symptom of?

Remember: Over-explaining is a trauma response designed to avoid conflict. “The logic behind fawning is that if a person does anything and everything they can to please the person who is trying to hurt them, that person might not follow through with the abusive behavior,” says Fenkel.

How do I stop over-explaining things?

With this in mind, here are five of the tips I share with clients to stop over-explaining:

  1. Listen and put your listeners first. Too many of us think about what we want to say, instead of what people need to hear. …
  2. Remember, less is more. …
  3. Focus your message. …
  4. Give the bottom line first. …
  5. Make it a conversation.


What is over-explaining in writing?

Over-explaining can manifest in several ways, but the core of the problem is always repetition—and it’s usually symptomatic of authorial insecurity. We distrust our ability to explain things well enough the first time around, so we stick in a second, or even third, explanation, just to make sure readers get the point.

What is over-explaining?

Over-explaining means describing something to an excessive degree, whereas oversharing is the disclosure of an inappropriate amount of information and detail about your personal life. These fall under the fawn trauma response (see podcast #302 for more information on the different trauma responses).

How do you show disappointment in writing?

Formal and informal ways to express disappointment!

  1. That’s too bad!
  2. That’s really disappointing!
  3. It wasn’t as good as I thought it would be.
  4. It didn’t live up to my expectations.
  5. We had high hopes for …
  6. I’ve never been so disappointed in my life.


How do you show confusion in writing?

You can have the character scratch their head. Give them a dazed look of bewilderment. Have them shrug their shoulders with their hands up. Have them put their hand on their chin like they are thinking.

What trauma causes oversharing?

Trauma dumping can become a way for someone to avoid processing a painful memory of an event in their past and is emotionally harmful to both the listener and the person oversharing.

What causes fawning trauma response?

What types of trauma cause the fawn response? The fawn response is most commonly associated with childhood trauma and complex trauma — types of trauma that arise from repeat events, such as abuse or childhood neglect — rather than single-event trauma, such as an accident.

How do you stop fawning?

How to overcome it

  1. Show kindness when you mean it. It’s perfectly fine — and even a good thing — to practice kindness. …
  2. Practice putting yourself first. You need energy and emotional resources to help others. …
  3. Learn to set boundaries. …
  4. Wait until you’re asked for help. …
  5. Talk to a therapist.


Is fawning a trauma response?

Fawning is a trauma response where a person develops people-pleasing behaviors to avoid conflict and to establish a sense of safety. In other words, the fawn trauma response is a type of coping mechanism that survivors of complex trauma adopt to “appease” their abusers.



Is mirroring a trauma response?

It’s a maladaptive way of creating safety in our connections with others by essentially mirroring the imagined expectations and desires of other people. Often times, it stems from traumatic experiences early on in life, as I described in last month’s article.

What are the 4 trauma responses?

Trauma response is the way we cope with traumatic experiences. We cope with traumatic experiences in many ways, and each one of us selects the way that fits best with our needs. The four types of mechanisms we use to cope with traumatic experiences are fight, flight, freeze, or fawn.

What is a fawning person?

: seeking or used to seek approval or favor by means of flattery … they are excellent emblems of fawning yet fickle fandom …—

What does fawning over someone mean?

fawn implies seeking favor by servile flattery or exaggerated attention. waiters fawning over a celebrity toady suggests the attempt to ingratiate oneself by an abjectly menial or subservient attitude.

What is fawning autism?

Fawning is an attempt to avoid conflict by appeasing people. They are both extremely common in neurodiverse people as it is a way for them to hide their neurodiverse behaviours and appear what is deemed to be “normal”.