I’m a writer blog

Guidelines for writing Poems, Stories and Tales

Random Quote 1

Size isn’t everything but what you do with that size is what matters … put that size to good use. There is no such thing as too small if it fits! There is no such thing as too big if it fits! There is no too small and too large, but not all sizes fit all, that can be tricky … always seek out the advice of an expert or a consultant skilled in sizing!

Sometimes however, the unskilled experience problems with their size and sizing and they feel that their size is inadequate l always say … if it fits, then what’s the problem? I sometimes like it to be a little bigger so l can get it in. Personally l always try for a size bigger than my own so there is space to wiggle it a bit.

Remember style is equally as important as size, so even if you are too small … carry it around in style and you will always be huge, erm… l mean tall!

Always look after your size and your size will look after you, treat with respect and you’ll always look great. I have always looked after my size, kept in good working order, so it’s smooth and doesn’t just slide in, but glides in with ease ……

… however my overall advice when size becomes a major concern?

Be aware that one is always bigger than the other and through observation:

The morning is a bad time for a quickie, because your size is still adjusting to waking up!

Mid morning can be more fun and successful, plus your size will enjoy it more!

Don’t push it in if it doesn’t go in straight away …

Use a shoe horn!

Use a shoe horn to ease it in nicely.

Finally, always remember to polish and keep polishing for best results – that way everyone is going to be happy!


“But there is a limit to thinking about even a small piece of something monumental. You still see the shadow of the whole rearing up behind you, and you become lost in your thoughts in part from the panic of realizing the size of that imagined leviathan.”
Jeff VanderMeer, Annihilation